I don't know where to start.
There have been a lot of things on my mind.
I got a gym membership. I'm excited about that. I hurt my leg with too much impounding workouts so I'm so happy I can go to the gym and workout on the elliptical. I wanna lose 45lbs by august... middle of august... I've lost 23 pounds in 21 days today I'm not sure though. SO I know if i stay dedicated I can make the goal or at least be close to that goal. In august my cousin will be getting home from his mission, he's been in Brazil for 2 years teaching people about the religion we believe in. I wanna look thinner when he gets back, that's my goal, for now.
I've been struggling with depression and urges to hurt myself physically. I'm ashamed to admit that, but I'm working on coping in healthy ways, ways that i won't hurt myself. I made two bracelets I'll take a pic and post them tomorrow so you can see what they look like. It was fun I didn't know i could be creative like that. =)
I went to counseling today, it was with my new counselor and she seems like a really sweet gal and I'm sure it's going to workout very well. I'll be meeting with her weekly. The one thing I'm nervous about is when i start to feel better i tend to say I'm done going, but then i fall back down to where i was at before. So I'm scared I'm gonna do the same cycle. I hope not.
Love yall
Love
Britni
Hey girly!
ReplyDeleteI am glad that you like your new counselor. And I am the SAME way when it comes to therapy. I seem to always stop or "take breaks" too prematurely. BUT I am glad that you are going :)
I am jealous that you got a gym pass, and I am excited for you - cause those endorphins are AMAAAAAZING!
I know you are wanting to lose weight and be healthy BUT....and I only say this because I care about you - please, please, please be oh so careful. I KNOW you know how obessive and out of control things can get when it comes to people with addictive behaviors (YOU) and addictions (losing weight). Be careful and make SURE you are talking to people throughout this process and being honest with them about your feelings and behaviors - okay???
later!
jenn